This week, I experienced something life-changing, something that shook me to my core and forced me to confront a deep, dark pain I didn’t even know I was still carrying. Several threats came together, forming the darkest storm cloud I’ve faced in a long time. And while I’ve worked hard on healing from a major trauma within my family that happened about six years ago, there was still something lurking underneath, a pain I hadn’t yet dealt with.
Until this week…
For the past year or so, I’d been in a really good place—mentally, physically, and emotionally. My kids are thriving, my marriage is strong, and I’ve built healthy habits like hiking weekly with an incredible group of friends who have become my tribe. But when I made the decision to leave my current role—one I had initially chosen to protect my professional future—I had no idea that this move would trigger something I wasn’t even aware I had been holding onto.
It all came to a head during a leadership meeting this week. I was hit with a wave of feelings of rejection from my team over the decision I had made, and in that moment, I created a false reality. It felt like all the work I had put in, all the value I thought I brought, had meant nothing. The sting of that supposed rejection made me feel disposable. I kept asking myself, “Why am I so hurt by this? I made this choice!”
And then, it hit me. I wasn’t just upset about work—I was experiencing something far deeper. My mind transported me back to a moment I hadn’t fully processed: being orphaned by my family six years ago due to the trauma we faced. In my workmates, I had been unknowingly seeking the belonging I lost when my family rejected me. The feeling of being rejected by my team felt like that moment all over again.
This revelation was a turning point. In an instant, I understood the source of so many past hurts, poor decisions, and boundary lines I had crossed in an attempt to fill the void of lost family. That understanding was overwhelming, but also a huge relief. I could finally see where this hurt had been coming from, and now I knew how to deal with it when it resurfaced.
But I wasn’t sure how to move forward with this newfound clarity, so I reached out to Iris, someone I’ve been working with for a while now. I took her burnout scan, and the results were eye-opening. The scan revealed how much I had been pushing myself without realizing I was nearing burnout. There were clear markers that this episode was boiling under the surface—like trouble sleeping, brain fog, and irritability—that I had been ignoring for far too long.
Iris and I scheduled a session to talk through this deep discovery. What she did in that session was nothing short of incredible. Without giving away all her secrets, Iris helped me uncover the source of that “ugly bugger” hiding inside, causing havoc in my life. She guided me in letting go of that energy, and within an hour, I felt a complete shift. It was a bright, uplifting change that had an immediate effect on my life. The results were almost unbelievable—an unexpected raise, a dream job opportunity, and an influx of projects I had been chasing for months.
One of the first signs I noticed was my inability to sleep properly. At night, my mind raced with thoughts of everything I had to do the next day, the week after, and even the month ahead. I would toss and turn, staring at the ceiling, convinced that if I could just get some sleep, I would be able to handle everything. But sleep eluded me, and I woke up each morning feeling like I hadn’t slept at all.
Trouble sleeping is one of the first physical signs that your body is under stress. It’s a signal that your mind is overactive and that your nervous system is on high alert. If you’re not getting enough sleep, it’s a strong indication that your body isn’t getting the rest it needs to recover, which can lead to burnout if left unchecked.
Another alarming sign that I learned from the scan was the brain fog that clouded my thoughts. I’ve always been a pretty sharp person, quick to solve problems and stay on top of things. But over time, I started feeling like my brain was wrapped in cotton, and even the simplest tasks seemed to take longer than usual.
Fuzzy brain fog is a classic symptom of burnout. When you’re under constant stress, your mind becomes overwhelmed, making it harder to focus, concentrate, and think clearly. What used to be second nature became a struggle. I found myself forgetting small details, missing deadlines, and feeling completely scattered. It was frustrating, and I couldn’t figure out why it was happening.
Concentration became increasingly difficult. I couldn’t focus on projects, meetings, or even casual conversations. I’d find myself zoning out, staring at my computer screen, trying to get back into the task at hand, but failing to muster the mental energy to do so. This wasn’t just about losing interest; it was the kind of fatigue that made it feel impossible to process anything.
If you’re struggling to concentrate, it’s a red flag that your brain is overwhelmed. Mental fatigue from burnout makes it difficult to stay focused on one thing for too long. When your body and mind aren’t getting the rest they need, they begin to shut down, and concentrating becomes a major challenge.
As burnout crept up on me, I began to notice that I was getting irritable over the smallest things. A comment from a coworker, a slow response to an email, or a minor issue that normally wouldn’t bother me would trigger a disproportionate reaction. I’d find myself snapping at people, and even though I knew it wasn’t their fault, I couldn’t control my emotions.
This is another sign of burnout. When you’re mentally and physically exhausted, your patience wears thin. Your body is in constant fight-or-flight mode, which means you’re quick to react in ways you normally wouldn’t. I had to remind myself that it wasn’t my coworkers or anyone else causing my frustration—it was the burnout building inside me.
The most alarming marker for me was when I started fantasizing about running away from it all. The idea of leaving my job, my responsibilities, and the stress of daily life seemed more appealing than ever. I felt trapped in a cycle that I couldn’t escape from, and the thought of dropping everything and running away became more and more tempting.
This is a critical warning sign. When you’re nearing burnout, the desire to escape can become overwhelming. Your body and mind are telling you that you’ve reached your limit and need to make significant changes before you break. Instead of running away, though, you need to confront the issue head-on and take action to take better care of yourself.
I’ve heard Iris say many times, “When your energy shifts, everything shifts.” I didn’t fully understand what that meant until I experienced it myself. The power of mindset, of recognizing and releasing what’s been holding you back, is real. I now see the correlation between shifting my energy and unlocking opportunities in life.
In the past, I had always pushed through, ignoring the signs of burnout and emotional exhaustion. But after working with Iris and taking her burnout scan, I learned that you don’t have to push through. You can take action, face your hurt, and make room for the growth that’s waiting for you.
Have you ever felt like you were drowning in a sea of tasks and responsibilities? That was me before I took Iris’s burnout scan. I didn’t realize how close I was to burnout, but the scan revealed how my mind and body had been signaling me for far too long. Trouble sleeping, fuzzy brain fog, difficulty concentrating, irritability, and the overwhelming urge to escape it all—all were signs I had been ignoring.
What I learned is that burnout doesn’t happen suddenly—it’s a gradual build-up. We often brush off the warning signs, thinking it’s just part of the job. But what if it isn’t? What if we didn’t have to wait until we hit a wall?
If you’re feeling burnt out, take a step back. Acknowledge the signs—whether it’s trouble sleeping, brain fog, or just feeling overwhelmed. And take action. You deserve to care for yourself. Just as I realized, it’s not about pushing through. It’s about recognizing your worth, understanding your pain, and giving yourself permission to heal and grow.